She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
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