why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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