I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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