ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
