We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
