Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize
