you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
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