we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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