Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
