dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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