I can't watch pbs sober anymore
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize
