Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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