I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
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