Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
