I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
