real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
