she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Randomize
