Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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