theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
There r osticjed everywhere
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
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