I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
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