In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Randomize