Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
