I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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