He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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