they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Small penises have feelings too.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
