He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
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