wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
