Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Randomize
