You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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