It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
