$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
