highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
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