Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
