and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Ladies don't puke and tell
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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