You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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