im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
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