She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
