Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Randomize
