He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Less talking, more tequila
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
I think I sprained my soul last night
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
