just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Are we still banned from the library?
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Randomize
