Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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