How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
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