The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
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