I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
