Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Randomize
