so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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