did you get engaged???
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Your penis caused this!
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
