he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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