I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
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