my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
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